Anger Problems
Anger management does not work!
You may have already have discovered this.
But there is a cure that does work!
You will discover that what you read on this
website will be radically different than what
you will encounter in most "anger
management programs." And that is a good
thing.
As you are aware, angry outbursts can be very destructive,
especially if they cause a person to say hurtful things, or if they result
in physical violence. I am sure that this is not news to you, or you
wouldn't be here on this website.
Whether you are the person who has the anger problem, or whether
you are the victim, it will help you to understand why the problem
exists, why it persists and is resistant to change, and what is the
cure. Please note that I am writing this page from the perspective of
the one who has the anger problem, so for simplicity I will be using
the pronoun "you."
Anger problems are especially frustrating for Christians. Most
Christians tend to want to be "good Christians", and so they hate
their own angry outbursts. They feel guilty after they "lose it" and do
something hurtful to somebody else. They feel like hypocrites, and
so they redouble their efforts to keep from getting angry - they try to
"manage" their anger.
Anger Management
"Anger management" is a current buzzword. Unfortunately
"managing" anger doesn't work, and "trying" not to be angry often
ultimately makes the situation worse.
A recent example of this failure, with which you might be familiar, is
Bobby Knight, prior coach of the University of Indiana basketball
team. According to what I read in the papers, he had an angry
outburst and hit one of his players. The university sent him to "anger
management" treatment. He subsequently had another major angry
outburst and was fired - despite having been one of the most
successful college basketball coaches in history!
Many have tried very hard not to get angry, only to discover that the
harder they try, the more they fail.
Why Anger Management Fails
There is a reason for this. "Anger management," or any attempt to
try hard not to get angry, is like lashing down the valve on a
pressure cooker so that the steam can't come out. Ultimately this
leads to destruction of the pot, and perhaps injury to anyone near
when it blows.
The Solution
The correct way to stop the steam from coming out of a pressure
cooker is to turn off the burner!
Likewise, the only answer to permanently ending angry outbursts is
to find the root cause of the anger, and then "turn it off."
There Is A Way To Turn Off The "Burner"
Despite the frustrations you have probably experienced in trying to
control your anger, there definitely is a way to end the angry
outbursts.
But you need help in understanding how this change can
happen.
The reason for the outbursts, and the cure, are surprisingly simple.
Copyright 2008 Edward Kurath
Anger management does not work!
You may have already have discovered this.
But there is a cure that does work!
You will discover that what you read on this
website will be radically different than what
you will encounter in most "anger
management programs." And that is a good
thing.
As you are aware, angry outbursts can be very destructive,
especially if they cause a person to say hurtful things, or if they result
in physical violence. I am sure that this is not news to you, or you
wouldn't be here on this website.
Whether you are the person who has the anger problem, or whether
you are the victim, it will help you to understand why the problem
exists, why it persists and is resistant to change, and what is the
cure. Please note that I am writing this page from the perspective of
the one who has the anger problem, so for simplicity I will be using
the pronoun "you."
Anger problems are especially frustrating for Christians. Most
Christians tend to want to be "good Christians", and so they hate
their own angry outbursts. They feel guilty after they "lose it" and do
something hurtful to somebody else. They feel like hypocrites, and
so they redouble their efforts to keep from getting angry - they try to
"manage" their anger.
Anger Management
"Anger management" is a current buzzword. Unfortunately
"managing" anger doesn't work, and "trying" not to be angry often
ultimately makes the situation worse.
A recent example of this failure, with which you might be familiar, is
Bobby Knight, prior coach of the University of Indiana basketball
team. According to what I read in the papers, he had an angry
outburst and hit one of his players. The university sent him to "anger
management" treatment. He subsequently had another major angry
outburst and was fired - despite having been one of the most
successful college basketball coaches in history!
Many have tried very hard not to get angry, only to discover that the
harder they try, the more they fail.
Why Anger Management Fails
There is a reason for this. "Anger management," or any attempt to
try hard not to get angry, is like lashing down the valve on a
pressure cooker so that the steam can't come out. Ultimately this
leads to destruction of the pot, and perhaps injury to anyone near
when it blows.
The Solution
The correct way to stop the steam from coming out of a pressure
cooker is to turn off the burner!
Likewise, the only answer to permanently ending angry outbursts is
to find the root cause of the anger, and then "turn it off."
There Is A Way To Turn Off The "Burner"
Despite the frustrations you have probably experienced in trying to
control your anger, there definitely is a way to end the angry
outbursts.
But you need help in understanding how this change can
happen.
The reason for the outbursts, and the cure, are surprisingly simple.
Copyright 2008 Edward Kurath
DIVINELY DESIGNED
Click here to begin to discover the way out. |